I nearly lost you
by HatakeYoruichi
Summary: Sometimes, you don't know who the love of your life is until they're gone. NOTE: I've added on to the 5th chapter. Let me know what you think!
1. Emergency!

Sakura rushed to the hospital. She was running as fast as she could and she was trying desperately to beat the ANBU there. Her heart was racing. Not because of the running, but because she was in a complete panic as she made her way through Konoha. She tried to recall the last time she was this upset over hearing the news of a fellow ninja needing emergency treatment. She couldn't.

She managed to beat ANBU only by a few minutes, but that was enough time for her to gather a staff of nurses and fellow medics and prepare the operating room for emergency surgery. ANBU busted into the room and laid the injured ninja on the operating table in front of her. In all her years of training with Tsunade-sama and becoming one of the elite medical ninja of Konoha, she had never seen so much blood. She shed a tear before she went to work.

"You fool…," she whispered under her breath.

Hatake Kakashi had been her sensei since she was 12. Along with Tsunade-sama, he had taught her everything she knows. He was her teacher. He was her leader. He protected her. Along with Naruto and Sasuke, he was one of the most important people in her life. She couldn't bear to see him like this.

She had treated his injuries several times before, but he was never in this dire of a state. He was completely unconscious when ANBU brought him in. _It was probably better_, she thought to herself. The pain would've been unbearable otherwise.

* * *

As she and her staff worked frantically for hours on his injuries, Sasuke and Naruto rushed to the hospital as soon as they caught the news of what had happened to their sensei. As they tore through the corridors of the hospital, they were greeted… more liked blocked… by the imposing figures of Asuma and Genma.

"How is he doing?," blurted Naruto.

"Sakura's working on him now," Asuma replied.

"It's been a couple of hours," Genma added. "We haven't had any news yet."

Asuma and Genma led the frantic Naruto and Sasuke into the waiting room where they were met with a room full of Konoha's best ninjas. Kurenai greeted them with her usual gracious and beautiful smile and offered them hot tea. They sat next to her. Naruto looked visibly distraught and while Sasuke tried not to reveal his emotions, the lone sign of his anxiousness could be caught only by the endless fidgeting of his left leg.

"Kakashi-senpai will be OK," Kurenai said to him reassuredly as she gently placed a hand on his leg to calm him down. The truth was, no one knew whether that was true or not, but Kurenai loved him as a teacher and friend as well and couldn't bring herself to think anything otherwise.

The room was deadly silent and the tension was suffocating everyone in it.

"I remember one time, I was on a mission to the Country of Sound with him and on the way there, we ran into enemy shinobi," Gai blurted out all of a sudden. Everyone in the room turned to look at him. "We were surrounded, but we weren't too worried. We dealt with larger ambushes before. I decided to make a challenge out of it. '_I bet I can kill more than you_,' I bragged to him. He ignored me in his usual hip, cool way, but I took the bet seriously. In fact… I got so caught up in keeping tally, I got careless for a second. That's all it took. One of the shinobi that had been in hiding during the fight came at me from behind. I didn't realize his presence in time, but Kakashi… because he always puts his team before himself… had been watching my back as well as his own and jumped in at the last second to kill that shinobi. Unfortunately, the shinobi's kunai managed to stab him in the abdomen as a result. He kept fighting with his injury, but as soon as we had taken care of all the enemy shinobi, I threw him over my shoulder and managed to get him to a local clinic to treat his wound… He won the challenge that day, 23 to 22."

After an extended pause, Naruto said, "He saved us from Zabuza on our first real mission as Genin."

"He tried his best to save me from Orochimaru. He tried to seal my curse and taught me his only original move in the hopes that it would save me from my own self…," Sasuke's voice trailed off. Everyone turned to look at him in surprise. He tended not to ever refer to that period of his life. Ever since his return, he tended not to talk to anyone at all other than his three teammates.

"He was one of the Jounin that jumped in to help me at the Chuunin exam years ago when it looked as though Neji was going to attack me after the match had been called," Hinata said in her soft-spoken voice as she looked around the room at the other Jounin that had been there for her that day as well with a grateful smile.

"He saved us from Kisame and Itachi," Kurenai added.

Asuma nodded in agreement, "And took one hell of a punishment for it."

The atmosphere in the room lightened up dramatically as everyone shared their personal stories of Konoha's favorite scarecrow.

* * *

Back in the operating room, Sakura was closing up the last of the major wounds on Kakashi's body. His uniform had been practically ripped to shreds from his fight. She smiled a little on the inside when she thought to herself, _but of course, your mask is still fully intact_.

Just then the injured shinobi on the table started coughing up blood. Sakura panicked as she wasn't ready for her patient to wake up just yet. He seemed to be having trouble breathing through his mask as well. She reached to pull down his mask, but hesitated when her hand touched his face. _I have no idea what you look like, Sensei_, she thought to herself. As the head medic at the Konoha hospital, she had full permission to take off the masks of wounded ANBU ninjas if it was required for their surgery. Although she was sure it was not against any rules or laws to take off Kakashi's mask to allow him to breath and check any injuries on his face, she wasn't sure if she had _his_ permission.

"What is wrong with me?," she said and proceeded to gently tear away the mask from his face. After being as gentle as she could be, she raised an eyebrow and narrowed her eyes in a look of confused anger.

"Idiot," she growled as she saw the second mask underneath the first. Again, she tore off the second one just as gently as she had the first.

When the mask came off, she just stood there frozen for a second. _He really is handsome_, she thought. She always knew he was an attractive man even if she had only ever seen half of his face. But she never really considered just how attractive he really is. She snapped back into reality when she heard one of the nurses sigh.

* * *

After more than ten hours of surgery, an exhausted Sakura finally left the operating room to let all the ninja in the waiting room know the condition of their friend. Everyone was relieved.


	2. In the hospital

The next day, Sakura, along with Naruto and Sasuke visited a recovering Kakashi in his hospital room. Just barely conscious, he could at least feel his teammates' presence around him. But he wasn't able to communicate with them. That didn't matter to any of them. They only wanted their teacher, their teammate, their friend, their protector to be OK again. Healed. Whole. They visited him everyday while he was in the hospital.

Kakashi remained at the hospital for the next 6 days – much to his objection. He hated being in the hospital. It made him feel useless. Broken. He felt like he lost his privacy. His well-guarded, precious privacy. Hell, no one outside of his parents, his original teammates, and his own sensei had seen his face in years.

_My face!_ Kakashi panicked. He touched his hand to his face to see if his mask was still on. He sighed in relief when he felt his mask. Just then Sakura walked into the room in time to see him remove his hand from his face.

"I thought you might want me to protect your secret identity, Kakashi-Sensei," she said to him jokingly.

He smiled. His voice was hoarse and she could barely make out the softest of all _Thank you_'s she'd ever heard. His smile was always just so sweet. She loved it when he smiled. She loved seeing the trace of a smile on his lips from behind his mask. She loved seeing how his (one visible) eye crinkled and sparkled when he smiled. It was one of the sweetest and most comforting things she'd ever experienced in her life.

"You should smile more often," she heard herself say out loud. Before she could think about it, her hand flew up to cover her mouth.

Kakashi smiled at her sweetness. This just made her blush and smile even bigger than before.

"OK, Kakashi-sensei. I need to check and replace your bandages. I may need to clean some of your wounds too, so the alcohol may sting," she said as her eyes apologized to him. All he could manage was a nod.

She moved closer to him and gently rolled down his sheets exposing his badly wounded and bandaged up chest. She inclined his bed so that he was sitting up while she cleaned him up. Slowly, she started removing the bandages from around his ribs, shoulders, and arms. As she ran her hands along his body, she noticed what a great body her teacher has. _Well of course!_ she told herself. _As strong as he is, there is no way he can have anything less than a muscular, finely toned body. He was one of the strongest ninja Konoha had ever produced. Son of White Fang, student of Yondaime… Stop zoning out, Sakura! Your teacher needs you and all you can do is admire his rock hard body?_

She looked up into his eyes. He had obviously noticed that she had been staring. She blushed but kept removing old bandage after old bandage.

"Alright, Kakashi-Sensei, I'm going to start cleaning these wounds now. Are you ready?"

Again, all he managed was a nod.

She dabbed an alcohol-soaked cotton ball onto the wound on his arm. He inadvertently gave a violent twitch. _OK, I have to keep him calm,_ she thought to herself. She sat on the edge of his bed, facing him and with her left hand, she held his right hand in her lap and with her right hand she gently continued to clean his wounds. His twitching seemed to subside gradually. His hands were also surprisingly gentle. They were calloused due to a lifetime of training and fighting, but while these were the hands that have a killed countless number of evil people, they were so tender resting on her lap. Supple and sensitive. She realized that she was stroking his palm and that he was surprisingly ticklish. She looked into his eyes. He was fighting back the urge to laugh.

She scooted a bit closer to him on the bed and started tending to the wounds on the other side of his body. With every twitch of his muscles, she looked up into his eyes. His face was only inches from hers. This is the closest she'd ever been to him. _Why?_ she asked herself. This man is so incredibly attractive, it's ridiculous. _This isn't the time to fantasize, Sakura. You are this man's doctor!, _she reprimanded herself.

She finished cleaning his wounds and checked on all his stitches and proceeded to put new bandages on him. _He was a surprisingly good patient for me this time_, Sakura reflected. Normally, he is every nurse's and doctor's worst nightmare. Never allowing anyone to touch him, demanding to be let go early, sneaking out in the middle of the night to go home…

He leaned close to her. His left hand rose up and gently held the back of her neck. He was trying to pull her nearer to him. Startled, she leaned in close to him. His mouth was almost touching her left ear. "Sakura," he whispered in a voice that curled her toes, "Thank you."

* * *

At the end of the day, Sakura, exhausted and starving, walked home alone. She stopped for a bit in the market and bought some fresh bread, cheese, and apples. _Good enough for a quick, light dinner for one tonight_, she thought to herself with a sigh. _Dinner alone… again_.

She and Sasuke broke up over a year ago and she's hardly dated since. Most of the time, she didn't mind it at all. She loved her job at the hospital, even if it did take a toll on her mentally sometimes, and she loved her job as a ninja, even if that did take a toll on her physically.

But she still had her family and her friends. It turned out that she was much more compatible with Sasuke as a friend; he was much too distant most of the time to share the kind of emotional intimacy she was looking for with him. But he was always reliable as a friend. She knew she could always count on him when she really needed him. The same was true with Naruto – he was her best friend and she knew he would never let her down… or let anyone else, for that matter.

"What about Kakashi?," she heard a voice suddenly say.

Startled, she looked around to see who it was that had been reading her mind. Across the market, she caught a glimpse of Anko talking to Tsunade-Sama.

"Sakura's been taking care of him," Tsunade replied. "He was just released to go home today, actually. He's doing just fine, although it will be a while before I assign him to any missions."

"Released or escaped?," Anko asked jokingly. "I've never seen anyone so averse to hospitals! Even Ibiki is a puppy compared to him! I'm surprised he stayed in the hospital as long as he did this time."

Just then Sakura felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see Kurenai behind her. "How are you doing, Sakura?"

"I'm doing fine. I was actually just on my way home. How about you?"

Ignoring the question, Kurenai asked, "How's our Kakashi-Senpai doing?"

"He was released today to go home. It'll take a lot of recovery time, but he'll be alright."

With a sigh of relief, Kurenai said, "Thank goodness!" After a pause she added, "It's because of you, ya know."

Confused, Sakura just raised an eyebrow.

"He never stays put that long in a hospital," she explained, obviously having listened to the exchange between Anko and Tsunade as well. "I doubt he would've if you hadn't been the one treating him. He loves you."

"Wha…," she gasped. "No!," she exclaimed, brushing off Kurenai's last comment. "He was just too injured to try to pull off escaping the hospital is all." Sakura was visibly blushing at this point.

Kurenai smiled and explained, "What I mean to say is that he has a deep respect for you and that's why he didn't give you a hard time while you were treating him. He treats you guys _(referring to Sakura, Naruto and Sasuke)_ differently than anyone else in the village. It's out of love. You three are the only three Genin he has ever passed."

"Oh," Sakura replied, mostly out of relief and a little out of disappointment as well.

Kurenai took her leave and waved to Anko and Tsunade as she walked off.

_I love him too,_ she thought to herself. _As a teacher, of course,_ she added quickly.

She recalled how he reacted to Sasuke when they finally found him years before, after leaving the village to pursue Orochimaru. _He was so disappointed in you_, she thought. _But it was because he loved you too. After all he taught us about teamwork, your betrayal in some ways hit him harder than anyone else on Team 7. I thought he'd never forgive you for your fight with Naruto. But it was Naruto himself who finally convinced him to give you another chance. Now, the original team is back together and we often go off on missions together. Just like old times._

As she walked home, she kept having flashbacks to all the times Kakashi was there for her: Protecting her from harm when she was starting out as a Genin, fighting alongside her on missions as another strong teammate when she got older, as a teacher when she needed help developing and perfecting fighting techniques, and as a friend when she simply needed someone to talk to…

Her eyes started welling up at the thought of almost losing him, but she fought back her tears furiously. _He's alive and well and that's what I need to focus on_, she convinced herself._ "What ifs" are just wastes of time_.

Just as a smile was starting to crack across her face, a flash of Kakashi's face leapt into her mind. She was startled into stillness. _What the hell?,_ she asked herself. _Sakura, _she heard his deep voice say into her ear, _Thank you._ She felt a tingle make its way up her stiff body. _Dear God, that man has a sexy voice! Why am I just noticing these things now?_ Her answer came almost immediately, _I was an infatuated 12 year old when he became my teacher and neither of us gave each other a second look back then. When I got older, I was either trying to retrieve Sasuke back for Konoha (or more accurately, for myself) or going out with him for a brief period and hoping desperately that one day he would become the man I always wanted him to be. Lately, I've just been wrapping myself up in my work ignoring most of the men around me._

Sakura found herself standing in front of her apartment door just then. _I must've zoned out and gotten here on autopilot_, she told herself.

She walked in, set her groceries down on her kitchen counter, and turned on her television, getting ready for another night of dinner alone in front of her television.


	3. Still recovering

She woke up the next morning and made her way to the training grounds, as she always did, for her morning workout. She was surprised this particular morning to see Kakashi there as well.

"What do you think you're doing?," she asked him in an angry tone as she rushed over to him. "I released you a couple of days early as a gift for being such a good patient but only on the condition that you would be confined to bed rest at home."

"Well…," he replied scratching his head and trying to come up with a legitimate excuse, "I woke up feeling so good this morning and thought that the best way to recover was to keep my body active. Besides, it's only a light workout," he added.

She looked around her. Kunais were thrown everywhere, there were explosive tags on some of the trees, the earth was scorched beneath them… _Liar_, she thought to herself.

All she could manage was a sigh. "Fight me," she finally said.

Confused, Kakashi raised his eyebrow at her.

"You're just as stubborn as anyone on our team and I know that I can't convince you not to fight right now. So the next best thing, if you insist on fighting, is for you to fight your doctor." She took her fighting stance and said with a cocky smirk, "Come."

Admittedly a little turned on, Kakashi smiled and took his fighting stance too. _Nothing is better than a strong woman_, he thought to himself.

Although they were both going light on each other, some of Kakashi's hits were still putting some painful bruises on Sakura. _He's taking advantage_, she thought to herself. He knew that she was only making enough contact with him to let him know that she could've hit him if she wanted to. _Train like you mean it_, she heard his voice say in her head. _He always pushes himself to the limit. It can't be good for him to be going this hard so soon after being released from the hospital. This fight has to end now._

Just as she thought that, she felt an arm wrap around her waist and another above her chest. She felt the cold steel of a kunai at her neck. "This is the end," he whispered in her ear in his deep, deadly, sexy voice. He was standing behind her and had her pressed firmly against his body. This wasn't what she had in mind when she thought that the fight should end soon, but she didn't really have any complaints about the situation either. She couldn't believe how strong he was, especially considering he'd just been discharged from the hospital the previous day.

"Sakura-chan!," a loud voice yelled. She looked over and saw Naruto and Sasuke approaching. The grip on her body loosened. She couldn't help but to feel a little bit disappointed.

"Sakura," Sasuke said, "don't you know better than to make him train so soon after his injuries?"

Sakura narrowed her eyes and glared at him.

"C'mon, Sensei," he said taking Kakashi's arm, "let's sit over here under the shade of this tree and rest a little."

The three of them sat under the tree and reminisced about old times. Suddenly, Sasuke blurted out, "I never apologized to you."

The other three froze and looked at him, not realizing who, exactly, he was talking to. "I've apologized to both Naruto and Sakura many times. I doubt I've finished apologizing to them no matter how many times they say they have forgiven me. The truth is, I'm not sure if I've forgiven myself yet. But I haven't apologized to you yet, Sensei. Not really. I keep starting to, but I think you keep purposefully avoiding the conversation and I let you. But I won't do that anymore. I… _we_ all almost lost you just a few days ago. From the beginning you taught us how to be a team and what it meant to be part of a team. Then I left. I feel responsible for ruining that sense of teamwork you instilled in us. I…"

"Sasuke," Kakashi interrupted. "You made a mistake. But clearly, that sense of teamwork has never left you. You didn't kill Naruto when you could have. You returned to Konoha. Your guilt is a sense of responsibility you feel for your team. The four of us are back together. There is nothing here that you have to apologize for… not anymore."

Sasuke just looked at Kakashi. First it was a look of astonishment, then relief, then contentment. A slight smile started to crack across his face when Kakashi raised his arm up toward Sasuke, his hand in a fist. With a full smile, Sasuke met Kakashi's fist with his own and they both knew nothing more needed to be said.


	4. At Seireitei

After work that night, Sakura met up with Hinata and Tenten at the Seireitei Sports Bar, the favorite local hangout of Konoha's ninjas. "How's Kakashi-Sensei doing?," Hinata asked.

"Better. Although he went to the training grounds this morning and overexerted himself. He's supposed to be at home right now resting," Sakura said. She thought back to their fight that morning and immediately remembered how he held her right before Naruto and Sasuke came. She could still feel his strong arms around her body.

"Sakura!," a voice said calling her back to reality. "Sakura! Where'd you go?"

"Oh, sorry, Tenten. I was just thinking about this morning. You know, he was released just yesterday and he still managed to win our sparring match? It's frustrating!"

"It's hot," Tenten said bluntly. Sakura gave her a confused look and Tenten explained, "Sorry, but he is. And you have to cut me some slack – my teacher was… um… _not in the same league_ would be the nice way to put it."

"At least you had Neji," Sakura said sympathetically. "Truth is, I think each of us ended up with the best possible team for us. Gai-sensei is a good teacher, even if he is a bit weird and has a questionable attachment to Lee. And Lee, he's a good man… odd, but good," she added with a smile. Then in a whisper across the table, Sakura asked, "Have you and Neji told them yet that you're dating, by the way?"

"Not yet. It's a bit of a hard thing to bring up because we're both a bit afraid of what it might do to our team dynamic," she explained.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Sakura unconsciously said under her breath.

The other two looked up at her surprised. "Are you talking about Sasuke?," asked Hinata. _You don't like Naruto do you?_ she thought to herself scared. Her and Naruto had just started dating and she was worried that her competition was about to be her sweetheart's childhood crush.

"No. Not Sasuke… and not Naruto…," she said softly and slowly looked up at her two friends to see if they had caught on to her implication.

Tenten started laughing. "It's about time you started noticing him!," she blurted out referring to Kakashi. "Why you didn't realize this a long time ago, I have no idea!"

"He is really handsome, Sakura-san," Hinata added blushing and relieved.

"Handsome doesn't even begin to cover it," Sakura said, relieved to be able to get her feelings off her chest. They gossiped about Kakashi for the next 20 minutes, about how she saw his face for the first time, how his voice made her toes curl, and how strong his arms were around her body. Then he, Asuma, and Genma walked into the Seireitei bar. Every woman in there immediately redirected their attention to the three men that just walked in and let out a collective sigh. Regardless of the fact that Asuma had been in a serious relationship with Kurenai for the last several years (although no one knew exactly how long since they had kept their relationship secret for so long), Asuma was the sexy bad boy that every woman had a secret attraction to. Genma, the playboy of the group, had the classic young, athletic looks and body that women wished their own significant others had. And Kakashi… well, there wasn't a woman in Konoha who hadn't had a crush on him at some point in time. He was dark and mysterious, and he had a bit of a legendary heroic status about him. But there was more to him than that – he was highly intelligent and thoughtful, he had a dry, sarcastic sense of humor, people tended to think he was a cold, emotionless man, but on the contrary, he cared deeply for his friends and teammates. Sarkura always knew these things about him, but somehow it all only hit her recently. _I'm probably just still emotional from the thought of almost losing him. You don't appreciate what you have until you lose it, right?_ she tried to convince herself.

Kakashi immediately caught Sakura looking at him from across the room. He sent Asuma to the bar to grab him a drink and with Genma in tow, he walked over to Sakura's table.

As he approached, Tenten leaned over to Sakura and whispered, "What I wouldn't give to rip that mask off his face. You should've taken a picture!"

"Hello, Sakura, Hinata, Tenten," Genma said to each lady.

"Hi, Genma-Senpai," the girls replied almost in unison.

"Do you ladies mind if we join you?," Kakashi asked. The girls scooted down the booth to make room for the men to join them. Genma sat at the end of the bench on the same side as Tenten and Hinata and Kakashi sat on the other side next to Sakura.

"Sensei, you're still supposed to be on bed rest. You shouldn't be drinking any alcohol with your medications," Sakura reprimanded him.

"Sakura, I'm not drinking tonight. I just came here to be with my friends," Kakashi explained referring to Asuma and Genma. Just then, Asuma walked up with a pitcher of beer and sat at the end of the bench next to Kakashi.

"Don't give the man a hard time, Sakura, he just got out of the hospital! Alright everyone, let the fun begin!," he declared with a mischievous smile. Sakura smiled and stuck her tongue out at him.

They spent the next hour talking, laughing, and drinking. Naruto walked in with Neji and pulled up two chairs to join the rest of the table. "Did you guys come to check out the band too?," Naruto asked the men at the table.

"Yeah, they're one of Kurenai's favorites," Asuma answered.

"Where is she, by the way," Hinata asked.

"She was running late trying to finish up her report on the last mission, but she said she'd be here by the time they take the stage," Asuma answered.

"In that case," Naruto turned to signal to the waitress for another round of drinks before finishing his sentence and everyone reshuffled their spots so that Naruto could sit next to Hinata and Neji with Tenten. To her relief, Sakura was still sitting next to Kakashi. Kurenai walked in ten minutes later and the space at the table continued to get tighter as everyone made more room for her to join. Kakashi scooted closer and closer to Sakura and the closer he got the quieter she got. "Something wrong, Sakura?," Kakashi asked her as he put an arm around her. "Is this alright? I promise I'm not making a move, just trying to make room," he said with a smile. She blushed and replied, "Of course it's alright."

"Good," he answered. He gave her a wink and turned and started talking to Genma. Tenten kicked Sakura under the table and when she glared back at her, Tenten smiled and gave her a wink acknowledging that she saw the exchange between her and Kakashi.

After another seven minutes, the band took the stage and everyone's attention turned to the front. "C'mon, baby," Kurenai said to Asuma as she grabbed his arm and pulled him to the stage. Watching the two of them together, it was clear to everyone how much they loved each other. There was nothing but pure joy in their eyes as they looked at each other. There was a bit of jealousy in everyone that saw them together.

After a while, both Naruto and Hinata and Neji and Tenten joined them by the stage.

Genma took the final swig of his drink and announced, "Alright, that redhead at the bar looks like she wants a dance. You two don't do anything I wouldn't do," he added with a wink as he made his way over to the lovely woman at the bar. He approached her confidently, put his hand on the small of her back as he took a seat next to her at the bar. He whispered a few things in her ear, she laughed and giggled and the two eventually made their way to the stage and started dancing along with the other three couples that were already there.

"Genma works fast," Sakura commented.

"I'm convinced he's using genjutsu," Kakashi joked. Sakura smiled and the twinkle in her eye caught Kakashi offguard. She was really turning into such a beautiful woman. Just then he realized that he was still sitting too close to her and that he now had room at the bench, he moved down the booth a little to give her some more room.

"Sensei, you… are you… I haven't seen you out with anyone recently. Are you with someone now?," Sakura's voice was uncertain and nervous as she asked.

"I'm trying the single life for a while," Kakashi answered.

"Sensei… as far as I remember, you've been trying the single life for quite some time now, with a few one-night exceptions that is," she added with a wink.

Kakashi blushed. He tried to keep his private life as private as possible. How did she know about who he had and hadn't been with? "Well… given the nature of what we do, I think it's just easier… safer… if I wasn't attached to anyone. I've made a lot of enemies over the years and it would just be natural to try to get to me through someone I loved," he explained.

"But can't the same be said of your friends? They can get to you through anyone that's close to you, not just a lover or girlfriend."

"True. But you guys can take care of yourselves. I would be more worried for the chumps that would try to attack you to get to me," he said smiling.

"So then the assumption is that you wouldn't ever be with another ninja?," Sakura asked with a hint of disappointment in her voice.

"Take a look at Asuma and Kurenai out there on the dance floor. What do you see?"

Studying them closely, Sakura replied, "I see two people who mean the world to each other."

"Have you ever been with anyone and felt like you're the only two people in the room? No one else exists to you other than that person?"

"Well, yeah. Is that a bad thing?," she asked.

"It is when you are a ninja. You drop your guard. You stop paying attention to your surroundings. It has the potential to get you into a lot of trouble."

Sakura frowned at the thought that there might not be a possibility to have a balance between a happy private life and a life as a ninja. Even more so, she was sad that Kakashi wasn't open to exploring that balance.

Sensing her disappointment, Kakashi added, "Of course that doesn't mean if the right woman comes along, I'm going to totally ignore her."

A little relieved, Sakura managed to crack a smile. Right then, the music shifted a bit to a slower rhythm. Kakashi got up from his seat and reached his hand out to Sakura. "Would you care to dance with me, Sakura? Or is there a rule from doctor's dancing with their patients?," Kakashi said with a smile.

A little shocked, Sakura paused for a second before reaching out and taking his hand. He kept hold of her hand as he lead her to the dance floor and her palms got sweaty almost immediately because she was so nervous. She had butterflies in her stomach, weak knees, and her heart was racing. _Calm down!_ she told herself. _It's not like you've never danced with a man before._

When they got to the dance floor, he gently placed the hand he was holding on his shoulder then slipped his other hand around her waist. He pulled her close and they began to dance. Sakura was so overwhelmed by her own feelings that she couldn't bring herself to look at him. His arms were so gentle around her body, but yet, so strong. His grip was soft and loving and at the same time, it wasn't one she could've gotten away from easily either.

She finally convinced herself to look up at him. He towered over her. When she looked up at him, he looked down at her and smiled one of his sweet smiles. All at once, all of her nervousness melted away and she smiled back and rested her head on his chest. He held her tighter. Neither of them said a word while they danced.

At the end of the night, everyone said their goodbyes and made their way home. "Sakura," Kakashi said. They were the last two to head out of the bar. "Do you want me to walk you home?," he asked out of concern for his former student but at the same time, he knew perfectly well that she could take care of herself.

"Actually," she replied, "that would be nice." She didn't agree out of concern for her safety, even though there had been a series of attacks on women late at night in Konoha. No, she just wanted to keep his company as long as she could for tonight. She grabbed her coat and she locked arms with him as they made their way out into the cold night.

It was snowing lightly outside and the air had a sharp chill in it. Kakashi could feel Sakura starting to shake just slightly; he unlocked his arm from hers and wrapped it around her shoulders instead. He pulled her as close to him as he could and ran his hand up and down her arm to warm her up.

He walked her up the stairs to her third floor apartment right up to her door. She gave him a long hug and thanked him for walking her home. "Anything for you," Kakashi said with a smile and a wink. Just as he was turning to walk away, Sakura blurted out, "Why don't you come in?" Kakashi turned around a bit surprised by the question and Sakura had to admit to herself that she was a bit shocked it came out of her. Since it was already said, though, she explained herself, "It's cold out, why don't you warm up with a cup of tea before you head back outside?"

"Well, I can't argue with that kind of logic, can I?"

Sakura smiled and as she opened the door to her apartment, she replied sarcastically, "I don't know, Kakashi-Sensei, I've heard you try…"

"Brat," Kakashi said smiling under his breath.

"I heard that!"

Kakashi laughed and closed the door behind him. It was the first time he'd been in her apartment. It was nice. Very cozy and well decorated. His place was cozy too, but other than a couple of pictures over his bed of his two teams, there were hardly any personal touches at his place. His decorative style was more minimalist and modern, with clean lines and simple colors. Sakura's place was the complete opposite. She had beautifully embroidered curtains, wall hangings, flowers on the table, even fancy pillows on her couch. He made his way over to her entertainment center. Next to the CD player was a shelf full of CDs and DVDs. _Eclectic taste_, he thought to himself. He turned on her CD player to see what she had in. U2's Joshua Tree album came on.

"Sakura!," he yelled out. "Good taste in music – this is one of my favorite albums!"

Sakura came out of the kitchen with two cups of tea in her hands. "You like? It was actually Ino that turned me onto them. But then, she's also responsible for getting me to like Shakira also."

"Hey! There is nothing wrong with Shakira. We do not talk badly about anyone that hot in my presence," Kakashi scolded jokingly.

Sakura laughed and indicated for him to have a seat on the couch with her.

"Kakashi," Sakura said timidly, "about what we were talking about earlier…"

"Yes?"

"Is it ethics or practicality?" When she saw that Kakashi just had a confused look on his face, she explained further, "I mean, do you think it's wrong for two ninja to get involved or is it just not feasible?"

"Well, a little of both, really. When you join the Ninja Academy or any dojo even, you are not going for social reasons. You go there to train. It's true that inevitably you will make friends there. Some become confidants, some become rivals, and some you end up trusting with your life. But you do not go looking for this. If it happens, you fully embrace it. If not, that's OK, because essentially you are there for _self_ improvement above all else. And practically, like I said at the bar, the best way for the enemy to get to you (especially when you are well trained) is to go through a loved one."

She took a nervous sip of her tea and changed the subject of the conversation. For almost 2 hours they talked about the hardships of ninja life, spiritual philosophy, and whether different colored M&Ms tasted different from each other. "I should be heading out," Kakashi said when he noticed the clock on the wall. It was almost 3am.

"Oh, alright," Sakura said in a tone that betrayed her disappointment.

"I had a lot of fun," Kakashi said noticing her tone. "We should do this more often…"

"Yeah…," Sakura replied, her voice trailing off. She walked him to the door, her mind racing, furiously trying to think of another excuse to keep him over. Nothing came to mind fast enough though. She gave him a hug at the door, his body enveloping hers. Her knees got weak at the embrace of his strong arms and she stumbled a little when he let her go. "I'll see you tomorrow, Sakura-san. Thanks for the tea." And with a wink, he walked out the door.


	5. Away on a mission

Days had passed and Sakura was finally beginning to convince herself that what she had been feeling for Kakashi was because she thought she almost lost him. He was so central to her life, the thought of continuing on as a ninja, going on missions without his protection and guidance was unthinkable. With the exception of a few text message exchanges, Sakura had been successfully avoiding Kakashi the past few days. But that was all about to become so much easier now. Kakashi was leaving on a week-long mission to an undisclosed location. The time apart would allow her to gather her thoughts and emotions and go back to thinking of him as her teacher and friend. Nothing more. Nothing less.

She managed to keep herself busy with her work. Every day was the same: wake up, train, go to the hospital and work, train some more, maybe this time with Tsunade-sama or Shizune, go home, sleep alone, and start all over.

As the week progressed, she felt herself get more and more excited about Kakashi's return from his mission. She told herself it was because she missed her friend and wanted to check in on her patient. Truth was, every time she saw a couple walking through the streets holding hands, or at a restaurant sharing a meal, or even sneaking off down an alley to steal a kiss, she thought of him. She could still feel the heat of his breath whispering her name on her ear, and the faint sensation of his arms embrace as they danced.

On the day he was supposed to come back, she met her best friend at Ichiraku for a ramen dinner. "Any plans with Hinata this weekend, Naruto?"

"I'm planning on taking her on a hike up to my favorite point on Mt. Konoha where I'll have a picnic ready and waiting," he replied with a smile. He paused, then looked at her questioningly and asked, "You don't think that's lame, do you? I mean, do girls still find that kind of thing romantic, or just outdated and unoriginal?"

Sakura smiled at her nervous friend and replied, "Hinata has loved you from the moment she first saw you. She just wants to be around you, Naruto. Anything you do that is thoughtful and allows you two to be together, she'll love. I promise."

Taking it all in, Naruto asked Sakura about her plans. "Are you seeing anyone now?"

Embarrassed, Sakura kept her head down, finished up her bowl of noodles, and just shook her head in response. "I just don't get it. You used to always be so open to love, now it seems like you've given up on the idea. There isn't even anyone that you're interested in? No crushes? You can tell me."

Just as Sakura lifted her head up from her bowl to meet eyes with Naruto, she caught Sasuke walking up to the two of them. Turning to look at what had caught Sakura's eye, Naruto smiled when he spotted his friend. "Hey! What's up, bro? You guys back from the mission?," Naruto asked.

"Yeah, it was exhausting! We had to escort this empress on a diplomatic trip. Only ONE assassination attempt all week! But it was pretty well planned out, I must give them some props on that. It got a bit dicey, but Kakashi-sensei and I had it under control."

Sakura went into a mild panic hearing this. "Is he alright? Did he get hurt? He didn't reinjure himself, did he? I can't believe he was sent away on a mission like that this soon! That's so irresponsible of him to accept it, too! I'm gonna go check on him."

"Sakura – breathe. Calm down. Kakashi-sensei is OK. You know him. He can handle one assassination attempt. Chill," Sasuke said trying to calm her down.

"He shouldn't have gone on a mission this soon after the last one nearly killed him! We nearly lost him, you guys! What would I… we have done if he hadn't lived through that? I just can't imagine… it would've just been so unbearable…," her voice trailed off. Looking down at the ground, Naruto noticed a tiny water puddle forming. He followed the trail of tears up to Sakura's green eyes. He jumped up from his seat and gave her a hug. "Stop crying now. I understand," he said to her quietly.

* * *

"What was that all about?," Sasuke asked Naruto after Sakura finally calmed herself down and went back to the hospital.

"I think she may love Kakashi," Naruto replied, a little confusion in his voice.

"That's quite a conclusion to jump to, Naruto. Why would you think that she loves him?"

"Other than her breakdown just now? She's been doing that a lot lately ever since he almost died. She thinks I don't notice when her eyes well up or how quiet she gets every time his name is mentioned. She used to be just as irrational when she loved you, remember? A lot has changed since Kakashi-sensei almost died… for all of us."

"Yeah. He almost seems _mortal_," Sasuke retorted with a smirk. After a long pause, Sasuke added, "It's a good thing, Sakura loving him. He's probably the best person for her." Seeing the surprised look on Naruto's face, Sasuke continued on with his explanation. "Can you think of anyone else, other than the two of us, who would do anything for her? She's like a sister to us, but she needs more in her life than just brothers who look out for her. She's surrounded by friends; what she needs is the intimacy that comes along with a relationship. You and I, we talk all the time… about our missions, about training, about our loneliness growing up. But you can't tell me that you don't get a different sense of relief, escape, happiness when you talk about all those same things with Hinata. Getting to hold that person's hand when you walk down the street with them, or hug them a little tighter for a little longer… communicating with your souls rather than just your words. She needs that. We all need that. HE even needs that. C'mon, he had a one year relationship with Anko and has only dated women here and there ever since. And who knows if he had any relationships prior?! He does so much for Konoha, and for us… he deserves love in his life. Think about it, whose life in this village _hasn't_ he saved?"

Naruto thought for a second, gave a shrug and simply replied, "True…"

"Go talk to Kakashi, I'll talk to Sakura. We'll come up with a plan." With that said, the two parted ways.


	6. Conversations

Sasuke knocked on the door to Sakura's apartment. When no one answered, he waited a couple of minutes then knocked again louder. Finally, he heard footsteps approaching.

Sakura opened the door in her bathrobe, towel wrapped around her hair. "Sasuke," she answered a bit startled. "What are you doing here?"

"Can I come in," he asked.

"Yes, of course! Sorry," she answered as she opened the door for him to come in. "Excuse the mess."

He looked around the living room. There were clothes strewn around everywhere, a plate of half-eaten dinner on her coffee table, and a stack of papers on the couch. "Let me move those for you," Sakura said.

"Did I catch you at a bad time, Sakura-san?"

"Uh... well, no. I've just been busy working on these patient files..." her voice trailed off as she took the papers to her bedroom. "So what's going on, Sasuke?"

"About earlier... you know, when you kinda broke down at Ichiraku," Sasuke said.

"Oh... right... sorry about that," Sakura said as she laughed nervously. "I haven't been myself lately. I don't know what's wrong with me. It was definitely an over-reaction. Nothing to worry about."

Not one to sugar-coat what was on his mind, Sasuke blurted out, "You're in love with Kakashi-sensei, aren't you?"

His words hit her like a ton of bricks. "Wha... what in the world would make you say that?"

"Please, don't deny it. We already figured it out."

"We? Who is 'we'?"

"Me. And Naruto. Listen, deny it to yourself all you want. All I came to say is that... it's a good thing. And we think you should pursue this. Kakashi is a good man. And he can give you everything you're looking for. And more importantly, everything you need."

Sakura's head was spinning as she heard the words coming out of Sasuke's mouth.

"I can't tell you if he feels the same or not, but it's worth it to find out." As Sasuke made his way to the door, he looked back at Sakura. She was obviously stunned by what he just said to her. It made him think back to their childhood when she had such a strong crush on him. _She was annoying back then_, he thought to himself. _But she was sweet_. He thought about how hard she must have worked all that time he was away. Working to become a better fighter and a better medic. Along the way, she became a better person too. She no longer needed saving, although he would put his life on the line for her any day. He thought about the time they dated after he returned. _The beginning was so perfect_, he thought. He tried so hard to be everything she hoped he would be... but that only lasts so long before the real person comes out. Sasuke wasn't a bad person, he just wasn't the right person for her.

With nothing else to say on the matter, he opened the door and looked back at the lovely girl who was left speechless by his words. "I'm sorry I couldn't be better for you," he said to her as he closed the door behind him. _I hope Naruto's conversation with Kakashi goes better_, he thought to himself as he made his way down the stairwell.


End file.
